FATHERLESS/ORPHANS, STRANGERS & WIDOWS ~ Basically those who have been abandoned, having only the Lord to rely on as their source. Although, it is true people may come and go throughout different points and times in our lives for a season, none have remained permanently.
In order to make sense of all this and especially for those of us who are sensitive of the heart and rather than seeing clearly that something is fragmented within the other person – we have a tendency to take this upon ourselves, looking inward and saying – there must be something wrong with me, am I unlovable? We are a very rare collection of people from that respect – One of our greatest qualities is we love deeply and fully – and this is something others will not understand unless they suffer it as well.
When you give your all, when you love wholeheartedly and deeply – you suffer loss fully and wholeheartedly. I can always tell who gets this and who doesn’t by how they interact with others. It is very eye opening to just observe. Most people love only on the surface, so they have no placement or are not familiar with loving others fully. They may try to convey they are the same or even give in such a way – but they don’t… And how do we know? By how easily they walk away… Those who are abandoned, do not abandon – not ever in the heart – because they do not desire to inflict that sort of pain upon another, which is why we often remain in a holding pattern, longing, after others have separated from us.
Jesus understood this pain of the heart – which is why He in turn said – He would never leave us or forsake us, He too was abandoned, betrayed and left alone by those who He called His friends. I was thinking about in the Garden how He was in view of what He would have to endure, asking just one disciple to stay away and comfort Him and pray with Him – but they all fell asleep. We too have been in that same position at times, haven’t we? Surrounded by those who say they are there for us – but when it is time for demonstration – they aren’t.
So for a few – chosen by the Father – to be His child in such a precious way, just like Jesus – He becomes our only true source emotionally, physically, mentally – just all the way around. There is really such a beautiful ending to this sacrifice we make in the natural which fuses us to Jesus, Who sticks closer than a brother, so that when abandoned He rises up as our only source of happiness, joy and hope.
Our Father takes great notice when we care for the least of these, the “strangers, fatherless, orphans & widows.” There is one example after another when He pointed out in His word just how righteous someone is who tends to this select group and it is mentioned over and over in the Word, which tells us just how important this is to Him.
So I pulled out several Scriptures, to clarify this priority of the Father to His family – but I am finding who really comes to the comfort of the fatherless, orphans, strangers and widows are just that — the fatherless, orphans, strangers and widows. We know Job was counted righteous because of the love he showed to this particular group and in turn become just like them, abandoned by all who said they would stick with him.
Because the Lord’s Words are so comforting, giving us placement in our identities, I am going to read several of the Scriptures which mentions us – as they portray the truth we may not matter to many, but to our Father in Heaven – we matter the most.
Ye shall not afflict any widow, or fatherless child.
He doth execute the judgment of the fatherless and widow, and loveth the stranger, in giving him food and raiment.
Stranger – foreigner in the World, misfit, the least of these
When thou gatherest the grapes of thy vineyard, thou shalt not glean it afterward: it shall be for the stranger, for the fatherless, and for the widow.
The Father always makes provision for us who have been abandoned
When thou hast made an end of tithing all the tithes of thine increase the third year, which is the year of tithing, and hast given it unto the Levite, the stranger, the fatherless, and the widow, that they may eat within thy gates, and be filled;
Yea, ye overwhelm the fatherless, and ye dig a pit for your friend.
Thou hast sent widows away empty, and the arms of the fatherless have been broken.
Because I delivered the poor that cried, and the fatherless, and him that had none to help him.
To judge the fatherless and the oppressed, that the man of the earth may no more oppress.
A father of the fatherless, and a judge of the widows, is God in his holy habitation.
Defend the poor and fatherless: do justice to the afflicted and needy.
The LORD preserveth the strangers; he relieveth the fatherless and widow: but the way of the wicked he turneth upside down.
Learn to do well; seek judgment, relieve the oppressed, judge the fatherless, plead for the widow.
They are waxen fat, they shine: yea, they overpass the deeds of the wicked: they judge not the cause, the cause of the fatherless, yet they prosper; and the right of the needy do they not judge.
If ye oppress not the stranger, the fatherless, and the widow, and shed not innocent blood in this place, neither walk after other gods to your hurt:
Look at this —- oppressing the stranger, fatherless and widow is equaled with shedding innocent blood
Thus saith the LORD; Execute ye judgment and righteousness, and deliver the spoiled out of the hand of the oppressor: and do no wrong, do no violence to the stranger, the fatherless, nor the widow, neither shed innocent blood in this place.
Leave thy fatherless children, I will preserve them alive; and let thy widows trust in me.
In thee have they set light by father and mother: in the midst of thee have they dealt by oppression with the stranger: in thee have they vexed the fatherless and the widow.
Vexed – mistreat, treat violently
And oppress not the widow, nor the fatherless, the stranger, nor the poor; and let none of you imagine evil against his brother in your heart.
And I will come near to you to judgment; and I will be a swift witness against the sorcerers, and against the adulterers, and against false swearers, and against those that oppress the hireling in his wages, the widow, and the fatherless, and that turn aside the stranger from his right, and fear not me, saith the LORD of hosts.
Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.
I often refer to us as “Messiah’s misfits” and it is time to grow… to grow into the truth of us. From being a spiritual orphans to sons and daughters of the Most High God and Father. John 14:18 tells us – He will not leave us orphans and in Revelation He promises that one day in a time to come – all will know He loved us. Mathew 17:11 promises us that Elijah will come in the last days and restore all things – which includes us. We are being restored, while the World turns and people go on about their own lives – The Father’s spirit is pouring out upon us, turning our hearts towards Himself and we are being separated out – and being drawn unto Him. There is a crown of life promised to those that simply just love Him. James 1:26 & 27 – reveals a great mystery…
If any man among you seems to be religious and does not bridle his tongue, but deceives his own heart (about himself) this man’s religion is in vain (about himself). Pure religion (untainted by ego) and undefiled (no mixture) before God the Father is this – to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction and to keep himself unspotted from the World. VISIT – not just lip service, this type of love is an action word – it is walking out the principals of love via demonstration of love. It is a knowing that what we do for the least of these – we are actually doing to Jesus – and once our eyes are open, we tread very lightly, but fully understanding we are in reality loving Jesus through others being the recipient of shared and complimented love where they is one source – HIM.
Once we grasp this kingdom way – we will never seek nor entertain tainted and false love again, which is counterfeit, producing no good fruit. We go from looking for love in all the wrong places to only allowing into us love which the Father ordains is permitted for our goodness and growth. And it is okay if you aren’t quite there yet – this is all about growth, not perfection. Are we growing? That is the question which we need to be asking. And both have fruit which help us determine if we are embracing the identity of being an orphan or a child of God.
Let’s go over some of these tell-tell signs to assist us in measuring our growth or if we have become somewhat stagnant or stuck in place. Obviously, I have already reviewed this list and if I am honest discovered I seem to gravitate at times to embracing being an orphan and not a child of God. As I go over this – you might want to take a mental note of just which mindset you see yourself agreeing with.
WORKSHEET by Johnny Long – which I altered a bit and helped give me strength and clarity on just what is truth and what is a figment of my own mind.
Applying what we’ve learned, pearls ~
- Our spirit knows the truth of us, but our minds do not grasp Spiritual truths continually. In our spirit we know we are a child of God but in our minds/hearts we believe we are orphans. Whatever truth we cling to and believe – that is what we will walk out daily. An orphan identity is bondage, which a child of God is freedom to be you.
- Fatherless, orphan, stranger, widow in Greek all means the same thing pretty much – UNCOVERED & UNPROTECTED.
- When we feel abandoned we will often believe we are failing on every level, but the truth is – we may be failing on every level but God’s – since only He knows the truth of us and our hearts, every tear we’ve cried and every struggle we could barely get through. And although man judged outwardly – only our Lord knows our obstacles, our weaknesses and desperation to overcome them and how our soul seeks to be pleasing to Him.
- An orphaned soul knows the Father as ruler only, not understanding He disciplines His own children for our good – not because He is mean and enjoys causing us pain.
- Abba means Father/Daddy – it is intimate and personal — our hearts cry out “Abba Father…” continually and He is always attuned to our cries.
- It seems we all have a common thread, which is – those who were appointed to love and care and cherish us didn’t, especially during our formative years, meaning when we were young. We are often not loved unconditionally, just the way we are and those who say they love us continually raise the bar – equaling our performance to their demonstration of love – this is an unholy alliance, not replicating the Father’s love towards us, but confuses our souls to become fragmented. And since some love is better than none, we are groomed to carry this way into adulthood.
- Many will compete with others for loving attention, isolate themselves, become paranoid and jumpy, have depression, hopelessness, suffer from anxiety and people pleasing, show lack of boundaries, overcompensate, become fearful of love, distant and easily offended or defensive.
- I want to encourage you to cry out to the Father as much as you need to – today and as you grow, especially when we are at the end of our rope and all we have left are tears which flow outwardly from a shattered heart.
- As lawlessness increases as a result of the love of many running cold, so is the after effect of people not feeling loved – the two go hand in hand.
- There is a special group of us who were abandoned and/or abused by our natural fathers, which place us into a particular position of not understanding the love of our Heavenly Father. Knowing our own father, who we could see did not engage with us, makes it harder to comprehend a Father we cannot see would love us any differently. We can be that change agent in the lives of many – especially our brothers in the Lord – even Paul called himself a Spiritual Father, saying we have many teachers, but not enough fathers, which conveys to us this problem is not something new in our society but was prevalent in Jesus’s time as well.
- One major issue Jesus had with those He was among was that the men often put their wives away and abandoned their children, which tells us this is nothing new – so keep in mind all those who have done so and not owned the error of their ways will face our Heavenly Father one day and give answer to Him.
- It is a real truth our Heavenly Father immediately accepts us, which is why we must love the truth and not make the mistake of comparing Him to our natural father. We often get it backwards thinking if so and so does not love us like Jesus loves the church – He doesn’t either. Jesus already set the command in place and it reflects on those who do not to a greater degree than it reflects on us not being lovable.
- The Word tells us our Heavenly Father desires to gather us under His wings as little chicks – meaning He desires to protect, nurture and comfort us – to sustain us to life everlasting.
- Every single person at some point has suffered loss – but if we forget that, we may in turn think the person we are dealing with is who we meet today, not really seeing the truth of them and that they have walls up with a smile on their face, but rest assured the truth is always revealed, soon or later. One can only maintain a falsity for so long.
- Religious people are often plagued with an orphan spirit and unaware of it’s influence over them. They often compete with one another, are insecure and try to prove themselves worthy of their calling – I’ve heard them even boast on their own humility, which are all signs that person is not sure of just Who they belong to. In the Kingdom of God – when we know who we are and who’s we are – we are settled in quiet peace, calm, knowing we are each on our own path with Jesus.
- Those being influenced will frequently secretly take advantage of others, appearing pious openly and need a lot of attention to make up for their lack of worthiness.
- Isolation is a big red flag we are influenced by this orphan identity – when you deep down you do not feel you belong in God’s family, which is often the residue of not being accepted by your own family. Psalm 61 speaks to this affliction in the soul saying – you gravitate to a mindset of doing it all on your own, frequently withdrawing, hiding from others, being overly dependent, mistrusting of people still trying to prove yourself as being needed.
- The Father did not create us to live in a vacuum and said from the beginning two is better than one. The enemy tries to keep us from embracing the Father and His family, the brethren and it is only orphans who say they need no one as a shield of protection. The Body of Christ is just that – a living and activated Spiritual body, which compliments one another and all parts are necessary for functionality and growth.
- In the wilderness we often become delusional thinking we need no one, in isolation. Fear and insecurity rules over the days of the wilderness and we become very unsure of our placement in the family of God – feeling vulnerable, uncovered, unprotected – so we tend to cover ourselves and hunker down in protective mode. We become wretched, naked and blind without realizing it.
- When we have a deep desire to be needed it reveals our weakness for wanting constant reassurance that we are okay. The truth is the Father doesn’t need us, He loves us and if we get into a mindset where we think He needs us, those we are appointed to love suffer – you will be constantly seeking many to fill your needy tank.
- If we need accolades from others every time we do something for the Lord – we are not doing it for Him.
- Those who need constant reassurance are just trying to prove themselves – but we are commanded to be pleasing to One, our Father in Heaven. What is amazing about Him is we get credit for attempting to please Him through His safety, acceptance and love for even trying to obey since He accepts us just as we are – while men seek proof, He knows our intentions.
- Humans generally love us by how we measure up to what pleases them and often withhold love if we are not measuring up to their demands – our Father is totally opposite of humans in this way.
- Humans will sometimes walk away or reject us when we do not do what they want us to do – but here is the beauty of our Father – He pulls us closer for instruction when we not obedient or misstep. We need to just accept this truth as a first step… We have no father on Earth and no one on Earth will or can love us like Jesus – this is a timely word for the season we are currently in.
- Orphans often are plagued to perform, feeling rejected and therefore must continually make themselves in disposable to others. They do not see they already add value, but will work constantly to overcompensate and be recognized as valued. They constantly feel driven to gain identity in work and expect the same diligence from others or view them as weak. Note: If you are surrounded by someone like this for very long and if you do not share in their demands to perform they will cast you down and then away, forgetting we all have a special gift to complement, not compete.
- Orphans have an ingrained mistrust of others, being fearful they will be punished at anytime they make a mistake. Our Father’s love is undeserved and unearned, the same is true for His favor upon us as His children.
- To overcome this identity and grow into the full knowledge of the truth as a child of God we must realize our minds are still carnal in many ways still. We must get bare before the Lord authentically and confess our fears and faults – crying Abba Father – it is amazing but truly weakness is our entrance to join fully with Him, He actually seeks out those who need Him in such a precious way.
- We also need to stay in the Word to nourish our souls back to health – this helps our hearts and eyes to be opened to defeat all the lies the enemy whispers to us on a daily basis and the negative self talk we have with ourselves on a regular basis. Oh and a side note – you do believe what you say by the way or you wouldn’t say it – whether that be about ourselves or others. A trap we often get into is speaking ill of ourselves to others so they comfort our flesh or carnal souls – when we should be taking all of this to the Father, knowing He alone can set us free and deliver us from these lies.
- Humility places us into perfect position to receive the Father’s blessing – He offers it continually, but we often reject it. His love will never grow cold, He will never leave us as others do and He actually loves us even more than we love ourselves. You do realize you love yourself, correct? You bathe, clothe, feed, warm/cool yourself – you tend to and nurture yourself – which are all demonstrations of love. Well, our Father wants to do all this and more because we are His children.
- When His peace settles into our hearts, wounds are healed, worry dissipates, wholeness takes place and we finally grow into a place where He is all that matters, because to Him we matter the most.
- In our weakness He rises up strong within us. All things we can do when all things we desire to do originate in Him and we simply cannot lose.
- In His wholeness we are covered unto completion – all that is missing is returned and He fills in the gaps of our hearts. It is through this heart change and we go from having a heart that is full of holes to a Holy heart sustained by Him alone.
- By His grace we get continual do-overs and second chances – He is not a 1 strike and you’re out Father – as we seek Him more and more we receive the gift of the unction to repent, which equals how we go and sin no more – it is not so much we lose the sin, but rather we shed off the desire to do that sin. It is not by might but by surrender that grace abounds so willful sin doesn’t. It is so important to understand none of us could even repent without His help – we wouldn’t know right from wrong without His guidance.
- It is His protection which enables us to trust Him during difficulties and He is so very patient, giving us opportunities daily, over and over to learn to lean on Him.
- When we live for the World and those in it – we can easily become hopeless, but when we live for the Lord we are filled with everlasting joy.
- His blessing and promise is to keep us continually, to not lose us as He shines His face upon us daily.
- As a reminder, it is not necessary we go around constantly telling everyone about our hardships in life – they cannot do one thing to remedy our brokenness – keep in mind the Lord comes to our aid and He already knows all about what we’ve gone through and the heartbreaks we’ve faced. We need to be satisfied and at rest knowing under His covering he will trouble those who trouble you.
- Our Lord has amazing qualities built within Himself to satisfy all our shortcomings and needs.
HE IS our –
Prince of Peace
Banner against our enemies
Father and Husband
So I know it has been a long time since I spoke – and I am sorry for that… If I told you everything that has been going on, you wouldn’t even believe it – but it has given me so much time for the Lord to cultivate more mercy and compassion within my heart for those who are hurting as I do sometimes.
One major thing that opened my eyes in this study was how off I was in my identity and that although many of these horrific things did happen to me – they do not define my nature – where my soul originated from and will return to again – my first Estate, our Heavenly Home.
Lately it is all I can do to keep up with emails, keep the prison ministry intact and do two things – Not deny His Name and Keep His word, just like it was written in Revelation –
8 I know thy works: behold, I have set before thee an open door, and no man can shut it: for thou hast a little strength, and hast kept my word, and hast not denied my name.
9 Behold, I will make them of the synagogue of Satan, which say they are Jews, and are not, but do lie; behold, I will make them to come and worship before thy feet, and to know that I have loved thee.
10 Because thou hast kept the word of my patience, I also will keep thee from the hour of temptation, which shall come upon all the world, to try them that dwell upon the earth.
11 Behold, I come quickly: hold that fast which thou hast, that no man take thy crown.
12 Him that overcometh will I make a pillar in the temple of my God, and he shall go no more out: and I will write upon him the name of my God, and the name of the city of my God, which is new Jerusalem, which cometh down out of heaven from my God: and I will write upon him my new name.
So during this time of year, we can sometimes just walk around like a shell – going through the motions, feeling like an outcast as we put on our best holiday faces, pretend to be joyful, praying others do not notice… It is like our flesh is engaged and our souls have checked out. I see now why the Lord placed a delay on our study about the orphan identity – it was purposed for such a time as this. I realize many of you have no one, while others have many, but they do not “belong”… those we are placed amidst are not always our people. And just like this World is not our home, they are not our everlasting family. It is almost as if we have to let the Lord shut those doors, in order we enter into His rest completely. Jesus said – He will not leave us orphans, instead He will welcome us into His family as a child of God. It is my prayer that you fully embrace just how the Lord is guiding you to separate completely from all that which He did not appoint or ordain for your life – knowing He is guiding us and preparing us to not have to endure the hour of temptation like the rest of those who occupy Earth. Is it painful? Oh yes, indeed it is. Do we stay in a weakened state from this point forward? Could be… But remember this – one day all will know just how loved we actually were by Him and if all you can do at the moment is just those two little things in verse 8 – which are not denying Him and keeping His word then that is really all you can do and Jesus knows what little strength we would be in during these days.
Surrender is a beautiful thing and a burden to bear. From the outsider’s point of view it looks like you are falling away, but to our Lord Jesus you are falling into Him. You are a child of God, growing each day into fullness of the Name of Jesus, like a voice crying out in the wilderness – nameless, faceless, stripped bare before Him – this is the process of taking His Name, we decrease and He increases within us and it is purposeful.
You are not a doormat and soon it will be your time to speak and shine. Again – the Father Himself is particularly fond of the strangers, widows, orphans and fatherless. All of this is purposed so we stop doing things out of our own strength and surrender fully to Him. He doesn’t need us – He loves us.
I pray this teaching has been both an encouragement and a blessing if even in only the smallest of ways. Those of you with such precious shattered hearts are on full display in the placement of a harsh and merciless world. You shine like the son, drawing those who are hurting unto yourself as Jesus resides within. Only Jesus can heal what others break – so I encourage you to continually seek His embrace.
I pray you have a blessed day in Him.